Bum Thoughts, Updated

I wrote this on Monday, over at Detritus, in case you'd missed it.

Bum Thoughts

So, this is the week, ick, that I've silently (and not so silently) really not looked forward to for nearly a year. A year ago on the 17th, I had a colonoscopy, and based on last year's results, I get to repeat it on the 17th. Today was the preop appointment and blood work followed by the now superfast EKG. Sigh. Step one on this week's journey down.

Tomorrow, tomorrow, I will enjoy, as it is D-day minus one. I get to eat, go about my business with the thought of Wednesday and Thursday looming in my mind. I'm gonna have some cake, I can guarantee you that. Wednesday, well, I plan on taking some books with me as I spend my time, ahem, prepping for Thursday morning. I'm gonna take some happy pills to make the anxiety bearable, and I'm not a bit embarrassed to admit that to the handful of folks who read this particular blog.

Last year, the doctor's office called me five days after the colonoscopy (on my birthday), when the biopsy was back, to tell me I didn't get two years like they'd thought; I had to repeat it again in a year.I sincerely hope that this year, as I go in once again on my husband's birthday for what is certainly not my idea of a birthday present (taking his happy-pilled wife in for a colonoscopy), I have to hope that we'll get an all clear this time, that there will be no phone call five days later on my birthday, you know? I hate repeating history, and I could use the good news.

It's bad enough, you know, all the danged screenings and tests a person's got to go through the older they get. Mammograms. Sigh. Pap smears. I still have to have them since I have a cervix, even if I have no uterus. Bummer. Fasting bloodwork for the diabetes, along with that awful eye exam with the drops and the puffs. Double sigh. So much more maintenance required just to keep things running half-assed, is what I'm saying.

I tell you what, though. That colonoscopy last year, five days before I turned 41 undoubtedly saved me a lot of grief a few years from now, and potentially, it saved my life. So, I may bitch about it. I may not want to do it, but my mama raised me right. You do what you gotta do. Don't matter none about liking it. Take the happy pills if you gotta to get yourself through it, but you do what you gotta do. Ain't no choices, especially when you've got three children who absolutely need you in their lives for the long term.

Well, that and the chicken fried steak waiting for me on the other side of this procedure. I am, by gods, getting my favorite dinner out of this. And if I'm really good, or worse, I find I have to do this all over again next year, chocolate cake with the most damn decadent chocolate ice cream I can get my hands on.

That's what I call making the best out of a bum situation, if ya ken me. :-) I do think Thelma and Louise would approve highly.


I made it through the prep yesterday, spending my "free" time reading research and writing to keep my mind off my issues. And today, I went in for the colonoscopy, where I learned from my doctor that last year's find would almost certainly have been cancerous this year had it been left in place, and wasn't it a lucky thing that we'd caught it since I was so young and that had to have been growing in me since I was 38 or so. Well, yeah! I'm sold on colonoscopies! Today's adventure found a small polyp. As it stands now, I get a three year break, although last year they thought I'd have a two year break and called me on my birthday to tell me it was more advanced and I'd have to do it again this year. So, I'm cautiously hopeful that I'll get three years in between. I can assure you this; yes, it isn't any fun to do the prep, but it can and does save lives.

I'm gonna get that chicken fried in a little bit. ;-)


Anonymous said...

I'm so glad that your colonoscopy went well & I hope you don't get a bad follow up call on your birthday this year.

You are right about the prep being bad, actually, I think it is the worst part of the procedure. I have done the prep twice now & hope never to have to go through that hell again. The colonscopy was a breeze compared to the prep.

Life as the mother of 4 said...

Gasp! Hearing something like that has to give you pause. I'm glad you are doing better and are on the other side for a couple of years!

KWombles said...

Thank you, both. :-) I'm so glad to be on the other side of it, and now that I've had a my favorite meal out of the deal, well, all the negatives about yesterday's prep fade away. Well, maybe not. It's worth it all, though, to stay healthy and avoid colon cancer. And if they call me in a few days to say I have to do it sooner than 3 years, I'll grin and go no problem, and begin planning the next reward meal. :-)

We're so lucky, despite the discomfort in the prep for some screening, that so many cancers can be caught in the early stages if we just grin and bear it.

Lyn said...

I'm glad you got through that. That does NOT sound fun.

I should probably get some sort of endoscopy for my IBS. Which hasn't been as bad as it usually is.

Which is nice.

christophersmom said...

Good luck with the results, Kim! I hope you'll have a great birthday this year.