12/12/2009

Just when you're pretty sure they've gone as far off the deep end as they can

AoA gives you this: "Preparing for Death at the Hand of Your Autistic Child"

No person owns these words, but since Stagliano is the managing editor, let's assume, especially since they have her flair to them, that they are indeed her words:
"That may seem like a macabre or shock-value headline. It is not. Dr. Trudy Stuernagel, Mom to a severely autistic son in NorthEast Ohio, prepared her family for the eventuality that her son, Sky Walker, could kill her.


And he did.

Read more about Sky Walker and him Mom (RIP) at the Cleveland Plain Dealer blog HERE. Little boys with autism grow up. Little girls too."
With months, or gods forbid years, of reading Age of Over-the-top-histrionics under your belt, you, dear readers, know the following from them:

1. Autism is caused by an evil plot by the Pharma Mafia and the government to damage an entire generation of children through vaccines.

2. These children are stolen away by the addition of something in these vaccines. Maybe it's the mercury, but if not, it's probably the aluminum, the squalene, the insecticide, the formaldehyde, the monkey virus, the aborted fetal cells. Something in those vaccines is to blame.

3. Big pharma wants to sell you their psychotropic meds for your child, not cure them, not recover them.

4. AoA, GenRes, SafeMinds know some folks who can recover your child. Just try their products. Now, if your kid doesn't recover, you aren't trying hard enough (Amy Yasko) or aren't dedicated enough. And if your kid is recovered, you're still going to have to keep them on the diet and the various protocols, or you too, like Jenny McCarthy, could make your child autistic again.

5. Autism steal the child and ruins your life.

6. Autism kills.

7. And if autism doesn't kill the child, when the child grows up, autism will kill you.

Fraktacular work, AoA.
**oh, and the vaccines are way worse than the diseases**

And once you read the piece directly underneath it (and others by this author), you'll know that:

8. Autism makes you, the parent sacrifice so much:

    a. the perfect life you dreamed of
    b. the perfect children you dreamed of
    c. the perfect career you dreamed of
    d. salon time and pedicures
    e. and apparently your dignity, although I can in no way see how catching poop in your hands has anything to do with dignity. You lost that when you decided your child's autism wasn't about him but about what it had cost you.

13 comments:

Mom26children said...

Kim,
AoA will milk all they can out of the Sky Walker story. ZZzzzz...yet again.
The second story of the day...I pray, for her unborn daughters sake, that she is born as close to her definition of "normal" as she can. I believe is she is born any other way, this "mother" will jump off the deep end. She is not far from the edge now...as you can tell in her writings.
I was speaking to a woman on the phone yesterday. She is going through radiation and chemotherapy. She lost her sister last year to the same cancer. She is tired...you can tell it in her voice...but she is not giving up.
She told me that she thought I was the strongest person she knew, for having 5 kids with autism and not giving into all the hype out there...for loving them unconditionally. I told her, if she looked in the mirror, there would be the strongest woman...hands down.
Neither my children, or their autism, makes me sad, angry, suicidal, or bitter.
My children make me happy and so proud for what they are and what they have accomplished.
Like I told my friend on the phone...I thank God every day for choosing me to be their mother. I am truly blessed.

NightStorm The Aspiewolf said...

As I am reading this article everything seems to be played out so typical, even stereotypically.

Sky was sweet intelligent boy who had had aggressive problems.

There was a lot warning signs including not treating the aggression as soon as it shown and the fact the divorce probably aggravated things. Not to mention she was enforcing this behavior and food rewards weren't helping either.

Regressive Autism+Poor parenting=Dead mom.

It's a tragety and I am sure the media will continue to paint Sky as a big dumb beast and Trudy as a hero.

*sigh*

Everything about this screamed a recipe for disaster.

But I have a question, how would you deal with aggression problems?

KWombles said...

Jeanette,

They don't seem to have anything but extremes: recovery stories through the use of their advertisers' products or the awful stories presented there. No balance.

Yes, they don't have anything new to offer or anything of value.

The mother who has sacrificed so much needs a shake up call and someone to point out that selfish is something she should add to her blog title.

KWombles said...

Nightstorm,

Aggression is a concern that has to be dealt with proactively. When my bright boy was little, he had significant issues with aggression. He hit, kicked, pulled. The girlies also have some issues with aggression.

However, all kids have some issues with aggression. They have to be taught how to handle their feelings of frustration and anger without beating the hell out of people.

With the bright boy when he was little, starting at 5 and ending at age 9 when he had his stroke, we followed the recommendations of his psychiatrists and placed him on ritalin, clonodine and zoloft (the last med was replaced at age 8 with risperadol) to deal with his various issues like aggression, distraction, hyperactivity, mood lability, and sleep problems. In conjunction with the medication, he received OT, PT, speech, and cognitive-behavioral therapy. We also intermittently received therapy as parents to work on behavioral issues through various reinforcement schedules and improving our parenting skills.

The meds reduced the aggressions, helped with the sleep, made him more manageable in a classroom. It didn't help him learn, though. When he had his stroke, we stopped all those meds and we brought him home and homeschooled him. Aggression issues, as frustration levels dramatically dropped, all but disappeared.He's been on no medications since, other than his aspirin for his blood clotting disorder (and intermittent once-a-day vitamins and minerals).

We've worked hard to help all three have the words to convey their frustrations so that they don't physically explode. We work even harder to minimize the things that cause that frustration or give them the tools to deal with it.

A sense of control, forewarning of what's going to be occurring, incentives for controlling the behavior and the very real promise of the loss of a beloved item if control is lost all work to minimize aggressive behaviors.

Recognizing that aggression can happen and attempting to proof your home so that if a loss of control occurs the damage is minimal is also important.

All three kids are about at the same mental level, which means they are very effective at needling each other. The bright boy outweighs his sisters by 120 pounds. Even though he is rarely physically aggressive, they are not left unsupervised together. The best solution to aggression is prevention. You don't let the situation get there.

If my bright boy's aggression got out of control and could not be cared for or addressed with medications and intervention; if he were truly a danger to me, to others, I would do the responsible thing and find appropriate placement for him where I would not have to worry for his sake or mine. I would hate to do that; it would break my heart to do that, but it would be the right thing, the smart thing, the proactive thing to do. I believe, based on puberty having finished for him with no increase in aggression that we have dodged this issue: that this kind of aggression that Sky engaged in is not something we will have to deal with.

I don't claim perfection here. My bright boy and I, and the rest of the family, may have just been lucky. We try to deal with things proactively, to anticipate problems and ward them off.

NightStorm The Aspiewolf said...

The best solution to aggression is prevention. You don't let the situation get there.

I agree with this. Parents should nip aggression in the bud before it gets bad.

kathleen said...

just blogged on Crystals latest "I have sacrificed everything piece and maybe will look back on all I have done" crap. in a word ick.

Mom26children said...

The one consistent that AoA bloggers have is the "woe is me" attitude. It is no wonder they don't see the improvements in their children...they are so far deep into themselves and their "problems" they cannot see the wonderment of their children.
Do their children see the disappointment in their parent's eyes? I pray they do not...

AutismNewsBeat said...

They haven't learned message control yet. That's a good thing.

Mom26children said...

Today, as I read the poem written by a sibling of an Autistic child, on AoA...I see the anger is not just staying with the parent's..but being passed down to their NT children.
How proud these parent's must be !!!

AutismNewsBeat said...

There's a sense of entitlement in that crowd that I find most disturbing.

Sullivan said...

The whole story has left me at a loss for words.

The treatment of the story, even more so.

I finally found some voice: http://leftbrainrightbrain.co.uk/?p=3825

Attila The Mom said...

Oh golly, words just fail me.

Chromesthesia said...

Dang... Their rants sound like something from a John Saul novel. Like the one where these boys were turned into soldiers or something due to IUDs...
I can't be bother with such folks because it really brings me down, and who needs more of that?